How Would You Know If You Married The Wrong Man?

If your husband said of another woman:

This woman is more to me, dead as she is, than ever you were or are, or can be.

Would you feel you married the wrong man?

If your husband secretly carried a golden lock of hair to which you find and react in the following fashion:

Bathsheba's eyes had been accidentally lifted at that moment, and she saw the action and saw the hair. She flushed in pain and surprise, and some words escaped her before she had thought whether or not it was wise to utter them. "A woman's curl of hair!" she said. "Oh, Frank, whose is that?"

And on reply you ask:

"Is she pretty?"

"Yes."

How would you feel?

How would you feel once you realise that the owner's lock of hair was the woman that your now husband had arranged to marry before meeting you?

Far From The Madding Crowd (1874) by Thomas Hardy is a novel where the heroine Bathsheba, has chances to marry three men.

Bathsheba is a vain young woman and turns down Gabriel Oak (shepherd) because she values her independence too much. She also turns down William Boldwood (prosperous farmer) as her interest in him is only aroused by his initial aloofness towards her. She then becomes smitten with the dashing Sergeant Francis Troy whom she marries.

Did Bathsheba make the right choice? How do you know if you are marrying the right man?

Bathsheba says to Frank of this incident:

"This is all I get for loving you so well! Ah! when I married you your life was dearer to me than my own. I would have died for you -- how truly I can say that I would have died for you! And now you sneer at my foolishness in marrying you. O! is it kind to me to throw my mistake in my face? Whatever opinion you may have of my wisdom, you should not tell me of it so mercilessly, now that I am in your power."

"I can't help how things fall out," said Troy; "upon my heart, women will be the death of me!"

I always say, don't be hard on yourself you can't help who you fall in love with. Everyone has a right to make a fool of themselves once in a while. It's human.

In the novel Bathsheba does get out of her marriage and ends with someone who is not a womanizer. (See women can only be tricked for so long!) And was women the death of Frank in the end?

You will have to read the novel to see.